Hi there! Happy Wednesday 🙂
I hope you’re having an awesome week so far.
My email inspiration today comes from a super common question that I hear all the time from clients, friends, and was something I used to wonder myself.
“I hate my job doing _______, but I have no idea what the heck I should do if I leave! I don’t know what my ‘ultimate passion’ is, and I can’t seem to figure it out, but as soon as I do, I’m OUT of here. What should I do?!”
Does that sound familiar at all? I’m guessing it does.
And while I’m all for giving your current job a fair shot and seeing if shifting your mindset and approach can make it infinitely better for you, I’m also well aware (having been there myself) that there comes a clear point, a demarcation, of knowing that this is absolutely not the right thing for you.
Regardless of how this sign that ‘I need to get the f out of here’ shows up in your life, it’s usually crystal clear that the end is here (or at least very near). And while that message can be incredibly freeing, it can also be INCREDIBLY scary.
As in, yes, you can finally leave this place that’s making you miz, but then what?! (Cue freakout and stressful LinkedIn browsing at jobs you totally don’t want but convince yourself could be sorta alright…maybe?) And this is where so many people get tripped up. They are looking for THE next move, for THE dream or passion, for THE ‘ideal’ path…and they freeze.
People do this in relationships (and so many other areas of life), too. They know they’re unhappy with whoever they’re currently with, and the idea of leaving feels freeing and exciting, but rather than trying to hash things out or end it, they stay. (Albeit complacent, not fully showing up, not fully being honest, the spark and excitement long gone, not giving it even close to 100%, not upholding commitments…) It makes no sense from the outside, and it’s certainly not fair to whoever else is in this relationship, but when you’re in the thick of it yourself, this paralyzing fear that can keep you from taking action feels all too real.
The truth of it is that so many of us are afraid to leave and jump without the security blanket or safety net of what we currently have. We crave certainty. We want to know the next option is going to be better than what we have now, we want to be sure our lives won’t fall apart as a result, and we want our paths to be a linear, upward movement to achieving all our goals and living the life of our dreams.
We get SO focused on figuring out what the ‘right’ answer is. We see it as “THE” move instead of simply “A” move.
Think about it: how much lighter does it feel, if we allow ourselves for a second to believe that whatever you do next doesn’t have to be “IT”, “THE” move? It can just be “A” move in the right direction, that direction being away from the hellhole cubicle that makes you completely miserable and likely consumes way too many valuable hours of your precious life.
We pressure ourselves and one another to be on these expedited timelines in virtually every area of our lives: our health + fitness, our careers, our love life, our network + social circles, etc. Always striving for growth and improvement with no missteps or straying off the ‘path to success’. But no matter how hard you try or how much you pretend, your life is going to ebb and flow, expand and contract, rise and fall. Literally. No. Matter. What. Whether you introduce these things or powers beyond us do (death, illness, financial woes, trauma, etc.)
Of course, go out there and get curious about some things that you’re interested in and want to learn more about. Do your due diligence, talk to people in the industry, journal about it, seek guidance from your intuition / Divine guidance, whatever feels good. You’ll be able to sift through a lot of crappy options just through doing that alone. But then: get ready for it…brace yourself…
…take the damn leap.
Pick something that sounds fun, interesting, engaging, or any of the things that are important to you in a career, and explore that. Try it. Fall in love with it. Hate it. Realize that you could never go back to your old job. Return to your former industry at a different company. Get curious about something else entirely.
I promise you that the linear path you believed you couldn’t veer from will always be there. You can always hop back in if that’s the conclusion you come to. In fact, if you do, you’ll probably add more value (+ unique value, at that) having left for a bit to learn more about yourself and the world and what does and doesn’t make you happy.
Or maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll leapfrog around to different careers (that whether it seems like it or not) are connected in some way to your bigger ‘career’ as a human. Maybe you’ll end up loving what was on the other side of that “leap”.
Many jobs and industries can make up a career. So if you’re willing to stop obsessing about whether this is “IT”, ask yourself what impact you want to have, what experiences you want to have in life, and find jobs that all contribute to that full experience of life.
You’ve got this. <3
As always, feel free to share this with anyone who may find it helpful, and I look forward to hearing how it helps you.
P.S. If you need some help with this (or other related topics) and are interested in possibly working together, click the ‘Contact’ button above, and let’s get talkin’!